... When No One Else is Watching

Getting in touch with the Italiano!

Every once in a while, okay, actually it's very often, I get excited about a new recipe I would like to try. I think it's about time I should admit I'm a foodie, although it's not so much a title I want to take on when I am also a person who is constantly trying to lose weight. It's a vicious tug of war. Every time I really start gaining victory against the scale I will see a cookbook or a cooking show with recipes  I absolutely feel I need to try. Sometimes it's to master a technique I've seen or simply because the finished product looks way too good to pass up but it seems if there is one thing I feel I am really good at, it's cooking. So, I guess I'm not a foodie so much as in wanting to go to the best restaurants to try the newest fads in food but I'm more of a foodie in I want to learn how to make the newest fads. Because why just taste them after spending loads of money in a restaurant  when you can learn the recipe and create it in your own kitchen any time you want? I guess if you don't like to cook or have a really difficult time cooking then the question has been answered for you, but for me? I cook.

My newest recipe that I absolutely had to try is an italian stuffed bread. And if you like antipasto then this is right up your alley! Luckily for our family, we are fans of olives, pesto, peppers, good cheese and anything italian, which is a good thing since Rob was raised by an Italian mother who loves to cook and is really, really good at it. I'm sure you can imagine the pressure of living up to an italian mother in law... thank goodness we get along fabulously! I really wanted to try this recipe because every spring Rob's parents come out for a visit and I always like to have an arsenal of new recipes to serve his parents. It spares food boredom and Rob's mom, Francine,  loves new recipes to take home with her, I am very happy to oblige.

I'm happy to report this bread is not only gorgeous to see on your table but also absolutely amazing to eat! Rob said it was one of the best things I've ever made... and that's a BIG compliment! Since the bread seemed to be a meal in itself I made small chicken caesar salads to accompany it and a perfect meal was made! I was very excited to cut into this because the ingredients put into it make for a beautiful presentation once it is sliced. Try this one... you will not be disappointed! And hopefully, my mother-in-law won't be either.

As a side note, I'm a big believer in making a recipe your own. I usually always alter the ingredients to what our family likes and sometimes increase or decrease amounts due to the same reasons. I used to be very strict on following a recipe but now I've found I have much more fun and sometimes even make recipes better by throwing all caution to the wind and just play around, not following the recipe at all. I think this is one of those kinds of recipes - you could easily add meats or cheeses along with different veggies and make it your own. I'll definitely be playing around with this one!

White, Red, and Green Italian Braid
Adapted from a recipe by Marlene Sorosky in Entertaining on the Run
Makes 1 loaf.

Dough:
2 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 package quick-rising yeast
1 tablespoon sugar
1 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 egg, at room temperature
2/3 cup very warm water (125 to 130 degrees F)

Filling:
1/4 cup basil pesto sauce, store-bought or homemade
1/4 cup sliced pitted Mediterranean olives, such as kalamata
1 1/2 cup shredded italian cheese blend or shredded mozzarella
1/4 cup chopped roasted red peppers, blotted dry
1/4 cup sun-dried tomatoes, drained and rinsed of oil

1 egg, mixed with 1 tablespoon water, for glaze
1 teaspoon sesame seeds (optional)

Fill a large shallow pan or roaster half full of water and bring to a boil (or pour boiling water in the pan). This will be used for rising. Set aside.

To Make Dough:

Place flour, yeast, sugar, and salt in food processor fitted with the metal blade and pulse to combine.
Add oil and egg and process until incorporated.
With the motor running, drizzle the water slowly into the dry ingredients, reserving 1 to 2 tablespoons.
The batter should leave the sides of the bowl and form a ball.
If it doesn't, gradually add the remaining liquid until a ball is formed.
Process 60 seconds to knead.
Cover with a towel and let rest for at least 10 minutes.
Meanwhile, prepare filling ingredients.

To Assemble:

On a lightly floured surface, roll dough to a 14 X 10-inch rectangle.
Place on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper.
Spread pesto lengthwise down center third of dough.
Sprinkle with olives, red peppers, sun dried tomatoes and cheese.
Make cuts at 1-inch intervals from filling to edges of dough.
Alternating the sides, fold strips at an angle across filling.
Cover with a towel.

To Rise:

Remove pan of boiling water from heat.
Place baking sheet with bread over pan.
Let rise 15 minutes.
It will begin to swell like a pizza crust.

To bake:

Place rack in upper third of oven. Preheat oven to 400°F.
Brush the egg glaze over loaf and sprinkle with seeds, if desired. Bake for 15 to 20 minutes, or until golden. Transfer to a cooling rack and allow to cool for 15 minutes before slicing. Serve warm or at room temperature. You can make this the day before and keep the loaf in the fridge overnight. Just reheat at 350 degrees F for about 10 minutes before serving.

Pictures you want? Pictures you get!

 
 

A New Year, A New Focus

Hi there, it's me again. You know, the person who blogged for a few years rather religiously and then dropped off the face of the earth? Well, I'm back. What have I been doing, you ask? Well, there has been that rather time-consuming task of parenting two brilliant and hard headed little girls, did I mention they're cute? Because they are. So cute that if you're on Facebook you see them all the time. That's the other thing that seems to have taken up way more time than I would care to admit. The creation of Facebook ruined my blogging, that's the real culprit of my failure to blog and let's be honest, it's much more easy on me to blame a website than my own laziness. If you're not a friend of mine on Facebook and haven't seen the kids for a while, well, here you go.

 
They're cute, right? Told ya.

I've also been doing this little thing called cake decorating. Wasn't really planning on having it turn into anything but it seems to have started to turn into a beast of it's own. If I decide to make something more of this we will see, but so far, it's fun. Here are some cakes I've decorated.

 
 
 
 
 

It's never been a secret to most people who know me that I love to cook and I have decided to try and take my blog more in that direction.. things that interest me and keep me busy rather than to just go on and on about what my kids do. Not that Avery and Hadleigh aren't interesting and fun subjects, and there will still be plenty of anecdotes about them because they are so entertaining, but I think it's time to start remembering who I am and was before the two little people who bless me most came along.

If I had endless supplies of money one of the first things I would do would be to sign up for culinary school with a focus on being a pastry chef. I find cooking and baking extremely relaxing, something I know many people do not find it to be, but for me, the one place I feel most at ease is in my kitchen tweaking a new recipe or creating one of my own. I guess, because I am not a very artistic person (I can't even draw a stick figure) creating recipes is my own personal version of art. My favorite time is on the weekend when Rob is entertaining the girls and I can go into the kitchen, pour myself a glass of wine, put a chick flick on the big screen tv (we have a great room which encompasses the kitchen and family room) and cook a fantastic meal. My own personal heaven.

I get asked frequently for recipes and ideas for meals and because of that I'm going to start putting different recipes that my family and friends enjoy on my blog. It's not that I think my recipes are so fantastic that you can't live without them, I just figure, why not? Who doesn't like to try something new and something they wouldn't have tried if they hadn't heard they really, really should? It's just me trying to put some happiness out into the world. With that said, here's a recipe for a family favorite. We usually only make these a couple times of year because it's hard not to eat the whole tray within a day, and it's somewhat naughty, don't let the fruit fool you. So great with a cup of coffee or tea on a weekend morning!

Blueberry Oat Bars

Ingredients:

1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour

1 1/2 cups quick-cooking oats

1 cup white sugar, divided

1/2 cup brown sugar

1/2 teaspoon baking soda

1/2 teaspoon salt

1/2 teaspoon cinnamon 

3/4 cup cold butter

4 cups fresh or frozen blueberries

2 tablespoons cornstarch

2 tablespoons lemon juice

Directions:

In a bowl, combine flour, oats, 1/2 cup white sugar, 1/2 cup brown sugar, baking soda, salt and cinnamon. Cut in butter until mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Reserve 2 cups for topping. Press remaining crumb mixture into a greased 13-in. x 9-in. x 2-in. baking pan; set aside.

In a saucepan, combine blueberries, cornstarch, lemon juice and remaining 1/2 cup sugar. Bring to a boil; boil for 2 minutes, stirring constantly. Spread evenly over the crust. Sprinkle with the reserved crumb mixture. Bake at 375 degrees F for 35 minutes or until lightly browned. Cool before cutting. Enjoy!

The urge is returning...

I'm feeling the need to blog again... maybe my writer's block has passed. The need to document everything that has been going on in our lives has come back to me and I hope to blog at least twice a week from now on. The next few days are going to be so busy, as my life now seems to be at all times, but I'm hoping to start catching up. Facebook updates can only do so much!

It's the little things, or rather, the most important things...

I am blessed with much... much more than many people. I have a beautiful home, cars that get us from point A to point B, amazing friends and many extras that so many others don't have. But they wouldn't mean anything if I didn't have the beautiful daughters and husband that bless my life. These three people make my life worth living. I only hope I make them aware of that every day!

 
 
 

Heard in our house

Our two beautiful girls have become some of the funniest human beings I know. It's always such a joy to hear what new phrases come out of their mouths, some more so than others but if there is one thing I can be certain of, I will most likely be laughing afterwards. Here are a few nuggets from the past few days.

• Hadleigh doesn't have a ton of words yet as she is only 20 months old but her favorite thing to say is "Is it mine?" Constantly, like a parrot. She's very concerned already if whatever she has or wants is hers... and not her older sister's.
• Avery and I were having a conversation about God the other day and I was telling her how special she was and how He created her in his likeness and she then says, "yes mommy, but yogurt makes me grow." Ummmm... okay.
• The other night I was up watching television after the kids had gone to bed. I was watching the finale of "The Biggest Loser" and it was nearing the end. Right then Avery comes out telling me she can't sleep. I pick her up to have a cuddle right as the show is ending. I then decide to watch the first 15 minutes because I had missed the first part of the show, right when the show starts up Avery says, "Are you kidding me? You just watched this." Can't say she's not paying attention.
• The girls and I have been putting music on a lot lately and dancing. One of our favorite songs is Train's 'Soul Sister' and the other day when I got back from my hair appointment Avery runs to the door and yells, "Hey, Soul Sister!" She's so spunky and is sooo much fun!

I'm sure there are more and I'll update soon!

Blessings

There have been times this week when I have been reminded how blessed I am. I use the word 'blessed' because I'm not completely sure I believe in 'luck.' I pray every evening... and many times between each nightly prayer. I can honestly say my prayers don't really change, I know that many people pray for wealth or fame or a new car to drop from the sky into their driveway but those are never the prayers I offer up. I pray for the things I find most important - that my family and I will live long, healthy and productive lives. I pray for the health of my children and that they won't hurt. I pray that Rob and I will stay healthy to see our girls live long and fulfilling lives. I pray that our extended family will be safe in all the travels they do and that their health will remain firmly intact. I don't believe wealth will make my life any better, easier maybe, but better? Not at all. I think some of the things we wish and hope for can actually have negative effects. So I pray for those things that will be good for my soul.

In recent days I have seen things that have touched my heart and remind me how very blessed I am to have two healthy daughters. There are so many parents who go through daily struggles to care for their children who are mentally or physically disabled and show the kind of love we all say we have for our children... but they are proving it. Their children aren't ordinary, they're extraordinary... they fight for every accomplishment, to do things that come easy to so many other kids, and the beauty of their efforts is awe inspiring. This is what this blog entry is about for me, I don't know the struggles that parents of disabled children go through first-hand but I am absolutely awe-struck by their love. When so much would be able to break them they see it as another wall to break down and they show their children the power to fight on and to accomplish more.

On the day before Mother's Day I can honestly say that even on my most difficult day there is nothing in this world that I value more than being a mother. I am beyond blessed to have healthy children who love their mommy and I hope they know that I return that love ten-fold. I will do anything for my children and hope they will always know that in their darkest time I will be that person who will always be on their side, rooting them on and helping them physically or mentally with anything they need.

Changes may be coming

I'm thinking of moving my blog because, honestly, I'm not seeing a reason to pay for my blogging service any longer when I can keep one up for free on a number of other sites. Once I scope out where I'm going to go and somehow archive all of my previous posts I'll post where I'm moving. If you definitely want to keep track of me, find me on Facebook under Jennifer Bowen Johnston and friend me and I'll list my new blog address over there. But before I go tonight, here are a few thoughts I've had today... and there will be much more to come on my new blog because I've promised myself I will become a better blogger in the hopes of recording some of our great memories for our girls. Because let's face it... I've kind of sucked in the last year. Okay, my tangent brain skipped a bit... thoughts of my day.

* I watched Glee's Madonna episode tonight for the second time this week. In many ways Madonna's music is the soundtrack of my youth. Many of my childhood memories have one of her songs running through the background and I can't tell you how many sleepovers I remember where my friends and I would be jumping on beds, singing into hairbrushes at the top of our lungs with Madonna's lyrics being the only ones coming out of our mouths. But funny enough, I never really thought about what those lyrics said at the time. Now, as a mom, I wonder what my own mother was thinking when she heard her eight year old daughter singing the words, "like a virgin, touched for the very first time!" I'm sure she was a bit mortified but in her own knowing way, realized I didn't even know what I was singing about. In all honesty, the only virgin I ever really heard about at that age was the VIrgin Mary and hey! we pray to her so the song can't really be that bad, right?! Oh, my innocent mind... sometimes I still wish it was so and I am hoping my girls have innocent minds until they are 30! I can dream.

* I also watched this week's episode of Modern Family which has become one of my favorite shows. In the episode (which was a repeat, but I didn't care) Mitchell is having a discussion with his younger step-brother, Manny, who wasn't invited to a party because his so-called friends have decided he's a bit "weird." Mitchell tells him that when he was younger other kids said the same thing about him but then spoke words that Rob and I discussed later on and said were the absolute truth in every possible way. He said, "For years and years, everyone is desperately afraid to be different in any way and then suddenly, almost overnight, everybody wants to be different." It's terrifying how so many of us are just sheep... following along with the crowd because we don't want to saunter onto the un-beaten path because we're scared to be different. I understand this well but at the same time, if there is one thing I have learned more in recent years, I hope I always am true to myself and am the most authentic self to my own being. And I truly hope I will be able to help my girls when they have problems of this nature. Just like any mother, I want my girls to be liked; for life to not be difficult, but I don't want that to come at the price of giving up who they are and I definitely don't want them to persecute others for being different. I hope they can see the beauty in difference.

Sometimes things just grab you

I read this comment today while perusing the comments in a blog I read, this one to be exact.

"This world is not where we end. We began long before and will continue long after. In the middle, where we are now, is always hard but often rewarding."

For some reason this comment touched my soul and felt more true in my core being than much of what I even hear or read in church. That may sound blasphemous but it is not meant that way. I figure anything that makes you truly feel is a gift. Very rarely do things grab me so strongly, but this I had to share. Oh, and that blog I linked to? One of my favorites, the man has a way with words.

There are days...

Yes, sometimes there are days when I highly wonder why I always wanted to be a mom so badly. A day like today, where my youngest was just such a foul little pill, makes me want to run out of the house screaming. Staying sane when my youngest is whining... seriously, all. day. long. and my oldest is constantly chattering, "mom...mommy... mom...mommy... JENNY!" Well, sanity is virtually impossible. Holy hell in a handbasket! Get me to a massage therapist... STAT! Instead I decided to iron everything under our roof when we finally got them both to bed and surprisingly it made me feel wonderfully calm. Note to self, next time you have a hard time getting your anxiety under control, break out the iron. Weird.

Here's a picture of my littlest devil in one of her moods. The picture actually made me laugh but the real, live version, funny enough, did not have the same effect on me.

Avery's Four! *sob*

*** As a note, I actually started this post in the beginning of January... two months later, it's finally finished.***

Yes... the fact that Avery has turned four actually does bring me to tears. I know it's very immature and a bit freakish but I'm okay with that.. I'm okay with the fact that I want my little girl to stay my little girl. She's beyond amazing in so many ways and I know there are so many good things to come but I'm loving this phase of her life right now. I love that she wakes up every morning and comes into my room and says, "good morning, mommy! It's a beautiful day!" I love that when I ask her to help me with Hadleigh she willingly takes on the task and tells me she's "helping mommy and the Hadster." Yes, she calls Hadleigh 'Hadster' ... it's a nickname she picked up from her father and it is so sweet to hear her little voice call out for her 'Little Hadster.' And I LOVE that she has finally taken to her little sister and says she's her best friend. Believe me, there have been moments I wondered if she would even acknowledge her little sister's existence so the fact that she has now come to love her so much makes my heart burst.

Avery is really coming into her own. She has always had the ability to become everyone's favorite person in the room and people love her the instant they come in contact with her. "Joy personified" is the perfect description for our little girl and the joy she gives to her family is beyond measure.

There are so many little things Avery does everyday that make me smile... here are some of my favorites:

Every Saturday Avery gets up with her dad and makes oatmeal. It's her special time with daddy and I can always hear her laughing and chatting.... constantly chatting (she takes after me.) It's music to my ears hearing daddy and Avery having their special bonding time.

Avery has gymnastics class every Thursday and Hadleigh and I watch Avery from a second floor viewing area. At least three times during the class she will look up and point and tell everyone in her class, "that's mommy! Look mommy! I'm doing my 'nastics!" or "There's my Hadleigh, look friends, that's my Hadleigh!" All of the fellow parents get a kick out of it and are always quick to say how much she brightens their day.

Cooking is something that I love to do and it makes me so happy that Avery loves to get right in there with me to help. She loves to add blueberries to the pancake batter, chocolate chips to the cookie dough and cracking the eggs to get ready to scramble. She always has to run and get her "yellow piece" which is a yellow step she uses to get up to counter height. She's meticulous about mixing and I know she'll be cooking up her own creations in no time... but not too soon, I don't think I can handle the thought of her using knives.

Finally, she loves her family just about as much as any little four year old possibly can. Avery loves us fiercely, but she has special places in her heart for grandma's, grandpa's, aunts, and uncles. I love that she already, at such a young age, understands the importance of family.

As Avery's mom, a mom who is very blessed to stay home with her kids, I am lucky enough to have seen every "first", every sweet and precious moment of her life and I could not be more honored to be mommy to such a precious little human being. I'm so proud of everything she is becoming; she's kind even when other kids are not, she can brighten the day of anyone who comes across her path, she is quick with 'hello's' and 'thank you's' and even a "you're so pretty, mommy" whenever I walk into the room after getting ready for the day (get's her whatever she wants every time!) She gives phenomenal hugs and sweet little kisses, and even though she can throw the occasional monster tantrum she puts the same amount of effort into loving everyone around her fiercely. Thinking about her as a little baby sometimes brings tears to my eyes because I wonder where the time has went and I can't believe how quickly these four years have flown by. But when I look at the little girl she is, I couldn't be more proud of what a wonderful child she has become and I'm so thoroughly excited to see what the future will bring. I know she will grow up to be a fabulous girl, teenager, and woman, and I'm so happy to know that I will be here to watch her every step of the way.